Skip to Content

Who is supposed to plan the wedding shower?

Wedding showers are an exciting pre-wedding event that not only celebrates the bride-to-be but also helps her prepare for her new marriage life. One of the most common questions brides may ask is, “who is supposed to plan the wedding shower?”

Traditionally, the maid of honor takes on the role of the chief shower planner. But planning a bridal shower is no easy task, which is why she often recruits the help of the bridesmaids to ensure everything runs smoothly. Here is everything you need to know about who should plan the wedding shower, what tasks are involved, and some tips for planning a successful and memorable bridal shower.

Who is responsible for planning the bridal shower?

As mentioned earlier, traditionally, it is the maid of honor’s responsibility to plan the bridal shower. This responsibility is bestowed upon her because the maid of honor is supposed to be the bride’s closest confidante and best friend. As such, she is usually the most appropriate person to take charge of the bridal shower and ensure that everything is taken care of.

However, in recent times, this tradition has changed. Modern brides often lean towards a more egalitarian approach to wedding planning, which means that the bridal shower’s planning responsibilities can be shared among the other bridesmaids, friends, or even family members.

What are the tasks involved in planning a bridal shower?

Planning a bridal shower can be a lot of work, but it is a great way to show the bride-to-be how much you care and how excited you are about her upcoming marriage. Here are some of the tasks involved in planning a successful bridal shower:

Setting the date and time

Before anything else, you need to determine the shower’s date and time. This will help you establish a timeline and determine the rest of the tasks. It’s essential to coordinate with the bride to ensure your proposed time works well for her schedule.

Creating the guest list and sending out invitations

Create a guest list that includes both family and friends. You can also ask the bride for input while creating this list. Once you finalize the guest list, send out the invitations. Nowadays, people prefer e-vite invitations to paper invitations.

Selecting the venue

Choosing the right venue is critical to ensure that everyone has a good time. Some popular bridal shower venue options include a restaurant, the bride’s home or backyard, a park, or a community center. It’s best to select a location that’s easily accessible and has enough space to accommodate your guests.

Deciding on the theme and decorations

The bridal shower theme usually revolves around the bride’s interests or preferences. You can choose from a variety of themes like a tea party, a spa day party, a garden party, or a wine-and-cheese party. Once you finalize the theme, you can start working on the decorations.

Planning the menu and drinks

Food and drinks are an essential part of any wedding shower. You can either hire a caterer or have a potluck-style menu. Make sure that the food options are varied and take into account any dietary restrictions among the guests. As for drinks, you can plan a signature mocktail or cocktail for the event.

Activities and entertainment

Plan some activities that the guests can participate in during the wedding shower. This could include games, quizzes, or even a photo booth. You can also plan some entertainment like a musician or a DJ to keep the guests engaged throughout the event.

Some tips for planning a successful and memorable bridal shower

Here are some tips to help you create an unforgettable bridal shower:

Collaborate with the bride

Include the bride in the planning process. This will help ensure that the bridal shower is tailored to her preferences and expectations.

Get creative with the theme and decorations

A unique theme and creative decorations will add that extra oomph to the shower and make it unforgettable.

Plan activities that everyone can participate in

Ensure that the activities are engaging and fun for everyone, regardless of their age or interests.

Communicate clearly with the bride, other bridesmaids and guests

Communication is key to ensure that everyone is on the same page for the event. Make sure to communicate all essential details through mails or texts to avoid any last-minute surprises.


In conclusion, though traditionally, the maid of honor takes on the role of planning the bridal shower, modern brides often prefer a more inclusive approach in planning their bridal shower. Whatever the decision is, the key is to work as a team, be organized and creative, and communicate clearly with everyone involved to ensure a successful and memorable bridal shower.


Does the mother of the bride plan the bridal shower?

When it comes to planning a bridal shower, there are a lot of factors to consider. One common question that often arises is whether or not the mother of the bride is responsible for taking charge of the event. Traditionally, the mother of the bride does not host the bridal shower. Instead, this honor usually falls to the maid of honor or another close friend or family member of the bride.

However, just because the mother of the bride isn’t typically the main person responsible for planning the bridal shower, that doesn’t mean she shouldn’t be involved. In fact, many brides would likely appreciate having their mother’s input and help throughout the planning process. As the mother of the bride, you undoubtedly know your daughter’s likes and dislikes, and you can help provide valuable insights and suggestions for everything from venue location to menu options and decorations.

If your daughter is close with her future mother-in-law, she may also want to include her in the planning process. Whether or not you decide to formally co-host the event with the groom’s mother, working together to plan the bridal shower can help bring the families closer together and ensure that everyone feels included and valued.

The best approach to planning the bridal shower will depend on your daughter’s preferences, as well as the specific dynamics of your family. Some brides may want to have a classic, feminine shower with lots of pink and frills, while others may prefer something more low-key and relaxed. The important thing is to work with your daughter to ensure that the event reflects her personality and tastes, and to make it a special and memorable occasion for everyone involved.

Who should not host a bridal shower?

Traditionally, the maid of honor is expected to take on the role of hosting a bridal shower for the bride-to-be. While it may seem like a simple task to gather the bride’s friends and family for a pre-wedding celebration, there are a few rules of etiquette that are worth noting. One such rule is that the mother of the bride should not host the bridal shower.

The reasoning behind this etiquette rule is that the bridal shower is meant to be a gift-giving event, with guests bringing presents for the bride-to-be. Hosting such an event could be seen as a gift-grabbing behavior, or could make guests feel pressured to bring more expensive gifts due to the host’s close relationship to the bride and her family.

Furthermore, hosting a bridal shower is often a time-consuming and expensive task. The maid of honor is typically chosen based on their close relationship with the bride, while the mother of the bride has already taken on many other responsibilities related to the wedding planning process. By allowing the maid of honor to host the bridal shower, it enables the mother of the bride to fully focus on her role in planning the wedding.

In addition, some may interpret the mother of the bride hosting the bridal shower as a way for her to assert her dominance or control over the wedding planning process. This can lead to tension and conflict between the different parties involved in planning the bridal shower, and ultimately detract from the happiness and enjoyment of all those involved.

While there may be exceptions to this rule given the unique circumstances of each wedding and family, following traditional etiquette by allowing the maid of honor to host the bridal shower can help to ensure a successful and enjoyable pre-wedding celebration for all involved.

What does a maid of honor pay for?

As a maid of honor, you have an important role to play in ensuring that the wedding day goes off without a hitch. This role comes with many important responsibilities, including taking care of the bride-to-be, providing emotional support during the planning process, and helping out with various wedding-related tasks. One of the questions that often arises is what a maid of honor should be expected to pay for.

Generally speaking, there are some things that the maid of honor is traditionally expected to pay for. These include smaller-ticket items that are part of pre-wedding events like the bridal shower and bachelorette party. For example, the maid of honor may be responsible for purchasing a bachelorette sash or tiara, decorations for the event, and swag for the other party guests.

In addition to these smaller items, the maid of honor may also be expected to contribute to larger expenses like bridesmaid dresses, hair and makeup services, and wedding day transportation. However, it’s important to remember that the expectations for each wedding party can vary widely depending on the preferences of the bride and groom.

If you’re acting as a maid of honor and you’re unsure about what you’re expected to pay for, it’s a good idea to have an open conversation with the bride and groom. Ask them for their expectations and let them know what you’re comfortable with contributing financially. It’s important that everyone is on the same page so that there are no misunderstandings or conflicts down the line.

The most important thing is to approach the role of maid of honor with enthusiasm and a willingness to help out in any way you can. Whether you’re paying for small items or larger expenses, the true value of your contribution will come from your presence and support during this special time in the bride and groom’s lives.