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Who says vows first at a wedding?

Weddings are a special occasion where two people pledge their love and commitment to each other. One of the essential elements of a wedding ceremony is the exchange of vows. Wedding vows are promises of love and commitment couples make to each other. It is an ancient tradition that has been passed down from generation to generation. In this blog post, we will be discussing who says vows first at a wedding.

Wedding Vows

Wedding vows are the most crucial part of the wedding ceremony. They are the promises made by the couple to each other that signify their love, commitment, and dedication to each other. Wedding vows may differ according to cultures, religions, and traditions, but the essence remains the same. They are spoken in front of family and friends, and often religious or celebrant officiates the ceremony.

Who Says Vows First at a Wedding?

Traditionally, the groom says his wedding vows first, followed by the bride. This traditional order of vows is simply the way wedding ceremonies have been performed in a patriarchal religious society for centuries. The groom, as the head of the household, is seen as the leader, and hence, he sets the tone for the wedding ceremony.

However, in modern times, the order of vows has changed or become less specific. Often the couple decides on the order of the vows based on personal preference, religion, culture, or other factors. Some couples say their vows together, while others prefer to say their vows privately.

Saying Vows Together

In contemporary weddings, many couples choose to say their vows together rather than repeating after the officiant. Couples who opt to say their vows together do so to emphasize the fact that they are entering into a partnership. It also conveys that they are equals in the relationship.

Another advantage is that it can make the wedding ceremony shorter as the vows don’t need to be repeated twice. The couple can choose to write their vows together, which enables them to express their thoughts and feelings about their partner without holding back.


In conclusion, weddings are one of the most memorable events in a person’s life. Wedding vows are the spoken promise of a couple’s love and commitment, and they are fundamental to the wedding ceremony. Traditionally, the groom says his vows first, but today, the order of vows may differ according to personal preference, religion, and culture. Whether couples decide to say their vows together or repeat them after the officiant, the essence of the vows remains the same; they are a declaration of love and commitment to each other, and they signify the beginning of a beautiful journey together.


Does it matter who reads vows first?

When it comes to wedding ceremonies, exchanging vows is one of the most significant moments for the couple. It is a moment where they get to express their love, commitment, and promises to each other. Traditionally, it has been customary for the groom to say his vows first, followed by the bride. However, with modernization, the question arises, does it matter who reads vows first?

The answer is, there are no rules stipulating who should recite vows first. The decision of who goes first is typically up to the couple, and it should be based on their beliefs, preferences, and cultural background. Many couples now choose to either recite their vows together or alternate in reading their promises.

In LGBTQIA+ weddings, there is no defined gender role, and thus, it may be inappropriate to follow a traditional format of the groom reciting his vows first. In such cases, the couple may choose to either recite the vows together or alternate turns to say their vows. This can help the couple feel more comfortable and included in the ceremony.

It is also worth noting that if the couple is having a nondenominational wedding, there may not be specific traditions for them to follow. This provides more space for the couple to create their own sequence of events, including who recites their vows first. It could be based on personal beliefs, preferences, or depending on the timeline of the event.

In some cultures, there may be traditional practices to be followed, such as in Hindu weddings where the bride’s father chants the mantras and gives her hand to the groom. In Christian weddings, however, there are no fixed rules. The couple may decide to stick to tradition or create new ones, including who reads vows first.

The decision of who reads vows first is a matter of personal preference and should be based on the couple’s individual preferences. The wedding ceremony is a significant event, and the exchange of vows should be a cherished moment for the couple. The most important thing is that the couple feels comfortable and happy with the sequence of events and traditions.

What is the order of wedding vows?

The order of wedding vows generally follows a tradition that has been established over time. Typically, the wedding ceremony begins with a welcome or introduction by the minister or officiant who is presiding over the wedding. This introduction may set the tone for the wedding and convey important messages about the significance of the ceremony. The minister might also share a personal anecdote about the couple or offer some words of wisdom as they begin their journey together.

After the introduction, the couple will exchange vows. This is often the most emotional and meaningful part of the ceremony. The couple may choose to recite traditional vows that have been passed down through generations, or they may write their own personalized vows. These vows typically outline the promises and commitments that the couple is making to one another as they begin their life together.

Following the exchange of vows, the couple will exchange rings. This is a symbolic gesture that represents the couple’s commitment to one another. The exchange of rings is often accompanied by a short statement from the minister, who may say something like, “You have exchanged vows and made promises to one another. May these rings be a constant reminder of the love and commitment that you share.”

Finally, the minister will introduce the couple for the first time as a married couple. This is often accompanied by a kiss between the newlyweds, which is a celebratory moment that marks the beginning of their new life together. From there, the couple will typically proceed with the rest of their wedding ceremony, including any additional readings, prayers, or special moments that they have planned.

Does the officiant say the vows?

Weddings are one of the most significant events in a person’s life, and wedding vows are a central part of the ceremony. In a traditional wedding, the couple exchanges vows as a way of declaring their love, commitment, and promises to one another. The exchange of vows is a crucial moment in a wedding ceremony that symbolizes the couple’s love, trust, and commitment to each other.

However, many couples wonder who should say the vows during the ceremony, the officiant, or the couple getting married? In most cases, the officiant is the one who reads and officiates the vows.

During a wedding, the officiant plays a vital role in the ceremony, and part of their job is to lead the couple through the wedding vows. The officiant usually provides guidance or prompts to the couple, asking them to repeat the vows after him or her.

The couple typically chooses their own vows, and the officiant helps make sure the wording is appropriate and harmonious. Many couples personalize their vows to reflect their unique relationship and experiences. The role of the officiant is to read the prepared vows and ensure that all the necessary elements are included.

During the wedding ceremony, the couple will often stand facing each other, while the officiant stands nearby. The officiant will begin reading the vows line by line, asking the couple to repeat each line after him or her. This process continues until all the vows have been read and repeated.

During a wedding ceremony, the officiant plays a crucial role in leading the couple through the wedding vows. It’s the officiant’s responsibility to read and officiate the vows, while the couple follows along, repeating the words after the officiant. That way, the couple can make their promises and commitments to each other in a structured and meaningful way, with the guidance and support of their wedding officiant.

Do vows start with bride or groom?

Wedding vows are promises made by a couple to each other during their wedding ceremony. It is a special moment where they express their love, hopes, and commitments towards each other. It is an essential part of a wedding ceremony that has been passed down through generations. One question that frequently arises is whether the vows should start with the bride or groom? Traditionally, the groom typically says his wedding vows first in the vow exchange, followed by the bride.

The standard order of wedding vows has been in practice for several years. As per custom, the groom goes first, and then the bride follows. The reason behind this precedence is rooted in history. It is a custom that’s carried over from older times in which the husband was more of a focus. The groom was seen as the primary participant in the ceremony, and the bride would have taken on a more passive role. However, times have changed, and today, the bride is given an equal role in the ceremony. So, it is totally acceptable if the bride decides to say her vows first or if they want to say the vows together.

In modern wedding practices, there is no strict rule about who should start the vow exchange. Couples are free to choose their own way of expressing their love and commitment to each other. Some couples prefer to write their wedding vows together, while others like to write their vows individually as a surprise. It is essential to communicate ideas and preferences with your partner so that both of you are comfortable.

The order of wedding vows has been traditionally set with the groom going first. However, there is no rule on who should start the vow exchange. The couple can decide who goes first or whether they want to say the vows together. The important thing is that they express their love and commitment towards each other in a way that is meaningful and memorable for them.